Letting Daddy Be Daddy

I was just reading some mom-blogs and came across this article.  I remembered the feeling she discusses of wanting to be super mom. After Na'Im had been with us a few months but still hadn't bonded with Michael fully yet, that feeling of not wanting to leave them alone together, of panicking that Michael wouldn't know exacly what every facial expression or noise meant, thinking that I was MOM and had to be at Na'Im's side every second I wasn't at work. I think I tried to keep those feelings under wraps most of the time, but admittedly I remember freaking out a bit unnecessarily on my poor husband, who would just look at me wondering who this crazed woman was and where his calm wife had gone! 

Thankfully, I realized how foolish trying to be everything to Na'Im was, and how much he would miss out if I didn't back off and let Daddy be daddy.  Some of my best moments of the day now are listening to Daddy and son playing together in the other room, or when I can hear their laughter from upstairs at I'm making dinner, or watching Daddy teach Na'Im how to shoot pinecone "rockets" or seeing Na'Im leave my side to go snuggle with Dad.  There is no one else who can make Na'Im laugh the way that his Daddy can.  No one else plays with him as roughly (but safely!) as Daddy, Na'Im trusts no one else like he trusts his Dad.  And that's beyond precious. 

I wonder after reading this article about the huge disservice I could have done to Na'Im if I had continued to hold on to him so tightly.  Would he have ever bonded so thoroughly with Michael?  Would he ever look at Michael the way he does, with such open admiration?  Would he have turned into a ~gasp!~ "Momma's Boy"? And how stressed out would my entire household be if I was trying to commandeer everything on my own? 

Every day, I become more grateful for the blessings I've been given.  Today, mostly for the gift of my incredible husband, who makes the most wonderful Daddy I've ever seen.  I'm so glad he stepped in and grew into his father role so quickly and so well.  Na'Im and I are both better people because of it.

And We're Back!

After a pretty long stand-by, some tough months and a lot of growth, the Andrejczyk family blog is back online! Since I last posted, our family has experienced some huge changes, none of which were particularly easy, but which all have led to a stronger family unit. And for that we are grateful. Michael and I have unearthed a deeper level of love and commitment than we've ever known before. We continue to build a beautiful marriage relationship based on grace and faith and honesty and tenderness and loads of patience and forgiveness...which, really, is what love is all about. The fruits of the time that we took and continue to take to focus on each other is evident in our renewed marriage. And it shows in the ways our family is growing: our little foster son Na'Im joined us on January 12 and brings us more joy every day than we've ever known. He brings us the possibility of a permanent family and of a larger family, and of course, lots of questions and red tape to get through with the state's system.

And so, we decided to renew our blogging. Or, rather, I decided after much prompting from Erin to start blogging again (thanks, Erin!). I do it as much for my readers as for myself: it's a good place to document our life together and events, as well as keeping others up to speed. I hope you find the blog interesting and informative, but also encouraging. Miracles do happen...I see it in my nephew's renewed life, in my beautiful neice who already has a fighter's spirit, I saw it as I coached my sister through her first labor and watched as my nephew emerged into the world. I see a miracle in my marriage that survived the worst storm and in the family we are building with hope. It is with this hope that we press forward, eyes heavenward, holding on to each other, and never looking down.

We're back in a whole new way!

House of Tears

It finally happened. And yet, it was so unexpected and abrupt. J and F went home to their grandmother/father tonight. After another day in court, we got the call at about 4:30 that custody had been granted to grandma. Mike and J met F and I at work/daycare, F said his goodbyes to his classroom and teachers and we rushed home to start packing them up. That chore done in about 25 minutes (thanks to those outrageously HUGE ziploc bags!), we had some sweet time to sit together and talk. We were surprised at how emotional both of the kids were, J who prides herself on never crying couldn't stop herself, and little F we think understood what was going on and was inconsolable and wouldn't let Mike put him down. It really was an awful transition, though Mike and I tried our best to talk things through with J, reassure her how much we love them both and loved having them here for the summer, it was just hard all around.

So after going out to dinner with some dear friends, we returned to a strangely empty and quiet house. It's awful. Mike and I are so much more emotional than I had expected we would be. I guess there really is just no preparing yourself for something like this. It literally feels like our children were ripped from our arms today. We know with time it will get better and we'll all move on, but for now, it's a house full of tears.

Bye Pookie!

This week saw our dear friend, Pookie, leaving to attend college in Toronto, Canada. Mike and Pookie had become very close friends, like brothers, and Pookie has been a big part of our family since we moved here. While we're excited for Pookie to return to school after taking some time off (as have I!), we're sad to see him go. I'm sure there will be several guy-only road trips to Toronto in the near future!

Not To Be Left Out...

The baby sister was in town this week on business, so I was more than thrilled to be able to see her! We had an amazing dinner at Tangerine Restaurant saw a few quick sites on Market Street, then took a drive over to Camden. I was so happy that she got to see where Mike works, meet one of his interns and a few of his girls, and see our place. Yay DD!





For the foodies in the group, here's what we had for dinner: (not pictured) Appetizer was "Crudo", entrees are served ready to share: "Lemon and Olive Oil Seared Tuna" and the "Chicken Tagine", and of course, the Tangerine Martini and the Mint Martini. Out of this world food and atmosphere!

A Much Needed Long Weekend

I'm taking a breather this weekend...took Friday off from work so I can head home to MA to see family. I need to see my sisters, play with the nephews, joke around with Jason, catch up with Mom...and, as an added bonus...my dear Jenny-friend from Cali will be in town! We haven't seen each other in two Christmases but talk nearly every day online. I can't wait to hug all of these people. My soul is in need of family-love. AND, as another added bonus...I scored us tix to see my all-time fave musician, Jason Harrod, at a house concert in Cambridge Friday night. This is going to be a soul-filling, energizing weekend for me!

I'll be leaving late Thursday night and returning on Sunday, so things on the blog will be quiet until I return.

Catching up!

Yesterday became the greatest day I've had in a while! The best part about it: I finally got to actually TALK with each of my sisters! Sounds like no big deal, but it's literally been a few weeks since I've talked with some of them...phone tag and emails just weren't cutting it. Missy called me at/from work, Ginny on her way to Bible study and DD after dinner. sigh. My heart was full after catching up with each of them, laughing with them and just hearing their voices. Have I said recently how much I adore my sisters?

Baby Shower

We're heading back to Massachusetts this weekend (yes, again!) to attend the baby shower our families are throwing for us tomorrow! We're so excited, it's going to be great to see everyone and have some time to catch up. The baby shower is an added bonus!



I'll be sure to take lots of pics to post next week! Enjoy the weekend!

As Promised....Pics of My Weekend Home in MA

Cooking dinner with Mum (my sister Melissa)...Orilus is cutting carrots (on left) and Jackson is using the handy Pampered Chef chopper for onions (in right).
My nephews...getting so big!
Me with the boys and Sandra, their neighbor friend. Mike and I lived in the same apartment building as Sandra and her family, which is right next door to my sister's house.
I heart Orilus!
Jackson showing off his new remote controlled car which he saved up for and purchased with his own moolah.



Note: My brother in law Jason is not in any of these pics as I had gotten a flat tire on my (Ros') car and he was amazingly kind and changed it and took it to get replaced. Nothing like a great brother in law, let me tell you! I was really touched by his generosity and kindness.

Christmas Photos

Still no diggie camera for the Andrejczyks...so here are some pics from our Christmas eve celebration with my family at DD's condo in Boston...stolen from Missy's blog!




The sisters at DD's condo overlooking the Zacam bridge in Boston.

The nephews showing off their new Red Sox hats from Grandma!

The nephews on Christmas Day at home with Mom and Dad, showing off their cowboy hats from Grandpa and Grandma in Kansas, Celtics T's from mom and Dad and Celtics tix!

Ooops....how do I delete pics? Oh well, we're cute!

The Loves of My Life

You HAVE to read the Christmas letter on my sister's blog...their lives as a family are so amazing. It's a real-life testimony to God's grace, goodness and provision, and to two parents' faithfulness, determination and excellent parenting. Check out the picture above of their family...including, of course, the two little loves of my life, my nephews Orilus and Jackson. Don't miss out on some great encouragement this Christmas season!!

http://www.teamwinchell.blogspot.com/

Remembering...

Today would have been our Meemaw's (93rd?) birthday. I didn't realize this until I was on the phone with DD this morning on my way to work. It so happens that I'm wearing one of her scarves today, which I'm glad about. I'm remembering Meemaw and thinking about my dad today...hoping it's a sweet day of rememberance and positive memories for him.

To Meemaw: We miss you, Mike and I, even though we weren't the best about staying in touch, we feel your absence in our lives now. And as we move towards becoming parents, I find myself thinking about you a lot...thinking of the traits that you possessed as a mother that I'd like to develop in myself (strength, independence, patience, steadfastness)...thinking of how much I would have loved my children to know their great-grandmother, who was a great woman in so many ways...thinking of the covering of prayer that Mike and I are now missing without you praying for us through this adoption process. I miss you more than I thought I would. But in the missing come the sweet memories, and the assurance of our reuniting one day, up in the lofty branches of a tree in heaven! I can't wait to see you again!

Thank You!

Thanks to all who participated in the "eat for eddie" event hosted by my sister last night in Lynn, MA! With your help, they were able to raise $2500 (CORRECTED AMOUNT) for Eddie's family. That pays five months of their expenses! On behalf of Kori and Eddie, thank you!

Eddie is expected to return to school in the spring if his recovery continues on the good path it's one! Please continue to pray for him! Pray also for our young friend Grace, who was Orilus' neighbor in the hopital as she battled a rare form of cancer, because she returned home this week to spend her last days with her family. Read my sister's post at http://www.teamwinchell.blogspot.com/. I can't imagine losing a young child to anything, especially to cancer. Pray the family will spend sweet time together and make lasting memories.

I will continue to post when we have opportunities you can take advantage of to help support families with children going through medical issues. When we join together, so much good can happen!

Inspiration Like Nothing You've Read Before!

(pictured here, Orilus after receiving his trophy)

Those of you who know me well know of my deep love for my family, and especially for my nephews. Last year, my (now 11 year old) nephew Orilus, underwent a bone marrow transplant in hopes to heal his Sickle Cell Anemia, a blood-disease that caused him much pain, lots of trips to the doctor and meds and prevented him from partaking in normal physical activity. After undergoing chemotherapy, the transplant (the marrow was donated by his younger brother, Jackson), long weeks of being contained in a hospital room with only his mom and the nurses for company, then a long stretch of many months sequestered inside his house while his body built back it's immune system, he is now completely healed. He has experienced a huge miracle of God's healing and grace. Mike and I were blessd to be able to live next door to my sister and her family as they went through the transplant...they are all positive people who strive to love the Lord, each other and others with all of their might. I love them dearly and miss them all terribly, especially when they reach milestones like the one that happened this past week.

Please read about it on my sister's blog...I could never do it justice as I wasn't there to participate in a huge night for Orilus. I'm so proud to call him my nephew, to have he and Jackson in our family, and to be sisters with the most amazing mother I know. It's times like these that my heart truly aches to be living next door to them again so I would be there for every moment like this. I miss them so.

Read about Orilus taking second place in his first 5K last week here: http://www.teamwinchell.blogspot.com/

May the life of that little 11 year old boy inspire you and urge you on in your faith this week. We serve a God who still works real life miracles!