Family Building

For Michael and I, our work of building a family is in it's very beginning stages. As we move through the adoption process (which I'll be better about posting as we go along), we are struck more and more with the reality of what having children and being parents means. These last two weeks since we attended the initial informative meeting at DYFS (Department of Youth and Family Services) in Camden, I've been doing a lot of thinking about how our lives are going to change. Here are some examples:

1. Thursday night we had a seriously fun night out at the local Victor's Pub on the Camden waterfront with our UrbanPromise staff friends (Brent, Ros, Lisa, Albert, Pookie, Dana) where we didn't meet up until 8:00pm. Going out that late once we have children won't happen....going out together won't happen without a whole lot of planning...staying out until midnight on a work night won't happen ever (who has the energy to do that when you have an infant waking you up at night?).

2. While sitting at my desk at work, I think of how tired I will be at times and how I need now to start getting into a better routine of sleep and exercise, so that I'm able to make the transition into motherhood and late night feedings more easily.

3. Starting to think about figuring out day care, and realizing that my dream of staying home full time won't be happening anytime soon. Learning to let that go.

4. Thinking of the distance that now seperates us from our families back home, and realizing that now as we start our family in Camden, we and they will miss out on that close family bond that we shared so easily with those we lived near. And realizing that we will have to be more intentional about creating family here.

5. Just the general changes that will happen to our daily lives: waking up earlier, caring for someone else other than ourselves and each other (and our fish Kamau, who lives on happily after 4 months with us!), creating routines and traditions, juggling two different work schedules with daycare, finding affordable furniture and re-doing one of the bedrooms into a nursery, seeing a car seat in the car all the time, ongoing visits from our social worker and so obviously many, many more changes that will happen simply because we are parents.

It's impossible to put into words how much our lives are going to change in a few months. It's also impossible to express how deeply excited we are for that change! I feel deep in my soul that Michael and I are meant to be parents, and meant to parent together, and I am already finding it difficult to wait. But in the waiting, we are trying to slow down and savor every moment we have left as just the two of us. It is a sweet time of life, as we anxiously prepare and look forward to our little one joining us, and at the same time take in every moment of the process. We can only pray that when our son or daughter is put into our arms, God fills us with love and affection, hope and trust, and a whole lot of faith.