Michael and I have been rather lax since we moved to Camden in finding a church family. At first, we were completely burned out from the church experience as a whole after serving in one for about three years. With all that happened there and the ways in which we felt we were mis- or over-used, we were just plain exhausted and not at all interested in attending anywhere. Added to that was the simple fact that we had not in that time attended regular adult service more than a handful of times, so services now seem very tedious to us (we were used to jumping around and screaming and singing at the top of our lungs and leading kids in worship and hearing their thoughts on God and exploring the Word in a whole different way than adults do, and that's hard for us to let go. I think sometimes it's so much easier to find Christ in the faces and eagerness of little children than in adults.)
Over the summer, we attended Sunday night UrbanPromise services, which were held at different locations each week and took their own forms. We also each led a small group with the interns. That kept us going for a while.
Then came the fall. And church-going came to a halt. I was ready, but Michael needed more time.
However, we did begin a monthly "Community Prayer & Worship" night with other Urban staff members, which is ongoing (in fact, this month is this Saturday at the Newhall's). These times for us are sweeter and more meaningful than gathering with a large body of strangers to listen to someone sing at us, and preach at us, which is often how it feels. Community is something that over the last 2 years becamse a hot topic for us, inspired mostly by my sister Melissa and her family.
For me, it comes down to this: What are we doing calling ourselves Christians and sitting in a church pew if we're not building true community? It's important to me, and to us, to have a close group of people that will challenge us, listen to us, pray with us and worship with us. If that happens in a larger group setting, great, but for me, it's been 6 years since I've experienced that. I would so much rather be spending my time and energy investing in the lives of the people who are already around me and working to share Christ together on a regular basis.
I think eventually we will find a church body that seems to have a true heart for each other and for their community (we actually did find one, our friend/Mike's co-worker Dana's lovely church in north Jersey, those people just truly loved and cared for one another, and the pastor had such a genuine heart to lead his people into better understanding of God...it was amazing. Bummed that is 90 minutes away.) The church "criteria" that often gets noticed and laughed about after we visit a new service can be just plain distracting, such as worship/music styles and corny, overly zealous greeters.
Overall, I just want to find a group of people who love God, care for each other in real ways, live as a community of believers, and invest in the community around them. Being in Camden would be ideal to me, as it would allow me contact with a city that I love deeply but often feel I'm just squatting in. But I think as we continue to look at churches, we need to keep our eyes on the mission, as Chris outlined so beautifully in his recent blog..."To increase and advance the kingdom of God", to which I would add "Love Christ and truly love each other".
Anyone else out there ready for community?
1 comment:
Becky,
I truly do understand your struggle to find a good church. I was there for a long time. The critical point in our search came when we finally decided to kill all our sacred cows of personal preference (i.e. music style, programs, etc.). We stopped asking, “What do we want in a church?” We stopped insisting that our new church be like our previous ones in this or that way. In the end, we reached the point at which we should have started: We asked, “What does God’s word say about church?”
I’ve listed below a few resources that help answer that question. Unfortunately, we didn’t find these resources when we were seeking a church. However, God sovereignly, lovingly, and Providentially showed us many of these truths from His word and directed us to a Christ-centered, biblically sound church.
•Mark Dever’s 9marks website is a great place to start - www.9marks.org.
•Joshua Harris’ book, Stop Dating the Church is a great read and contains a section with criteria for choosing a church, criteria very similar to Dever’s.
•A book called Life in the Father’s House: A Member’s Guide to the Local Church by Wayne A. Mack and David Swavely. This book is very basic and shows us what a good church should look like and what our role in and relationship to the church should be.
I’m sure there are many others that I have not read or encountered, but hopefully this helps. Keep in mind that the things you are looking for (church with a heart for outreach and evangelism, etc.) are things that flow naturally from a church that is biblically sound and has a high-view of God and scripture. We’ll keep this in prayer.
Bob
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